The Pea
by Amycat8733
Summary: A scientific mission turns into an opportunity for more when the team undergoes a test with a potential trade partner. Gen, adventure, H/C, romance


Hello and Welcome! This story is not my usual fare for this site and is here as a sample. If you, my readers, like it, I shall post the other stories with my fave flyboys here.

Comments are welcome, flames will be deleted. Enjoy and let me know what you think.

* * *

Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard and Colonel Cameron Mitchell stepped through the Gate together and surveyed the welcoming committee before them. The Pergolans were pretty friendly and also not superstitious. As long as you did no harm they were easy-going people. For John, their welcome was a pretty normal sight as his team did a lot of initial planetary surveys but also some first contact missions. Or they had. Before the ungrateful Ancients kicked them out of Atlantis. Damn, he'd promised himself that he wouldn't dwell on what he no longer had. He had the love of the man beside him and good friends in Rodney, Carson, and Elizabeth, along with Jack, Sam and several others. It was because of Sam he was here today instead of alone with the green team Landry had assigned to him.

Sam was speaking at a conference in Stockholm, Teal'c was on Dakara for a meeting of the Free Jaffa Council, and Daniel and Vala were checking out a newly-discovered Egyptian complex that seemed to predate the arrival of Ra, which meant Cam was short a team. His team needed some experience working with other teams and dealing with natives, so a joint mission was proposed. One of the oversized security teams had been added as security because Landry did not want to explain to the President how a national treasure had been kidnapped. Again. He'd heard that the chewing out Elizabeth had received after he'd been taken by Kolya had blistered paint three rooms away.

John slipped his aviators on and heaved a sigh. He was sorely tempted to pull the skein of paracord out of his pack, cut it into thirds and fashion leashes for his team.

"Honored Sir?"

John looked down to see one of the village kids at his elbow. He started to greet him as he would an Earth kid but remembered the briefing on Pergola. Their one peculiarity was in their speech. He squatted down to be at the kid's height. "Yes, young one?"

"You may wish to stop your worker. The _mitral_ plant is poisonous."

John stood and sure enough, his botanist was in the middle of a patch of a vine with somewhat familiar leaves. "Bambus! Get out of that vine. That plant is poisonous!" He looked down at the kid. "How is the plant poisonous?"

"Not everyone is affected, but it causes big red spots and much itching. The Herb Mothers have special clothes that any who come in contact with it must wear as it can spread by touch."

John homed in on Bambus. He'd gotten out of the vine, but he was already scratching furiously. If this stuff was related to poison ivy, that was a bad sign. He peered down at the boy. "Young one, what are you called?"

The boy puffed up in pride. To be asked one's name by an Elder was a sign of respect.

"I am called Tolling, Honored Sir."

"Would you show me to the Herb Mother? I am afraid that my worker has fallen afoul of the _mitral_." John glanced around and found Cam deep in conversation with several of the Elders. Using their telepathic bond, he reached out and gently touched Cam's mind. He'd been practicing with Teyla since he'd gained the ability last year. _*"I'm going to speak with the Herb Mother. Seems Bambus found the local poison ivy."*_

 _*"Go do what you need to."*_ Cam's mind voice was as rich as his speaking voice and John just wanted to roll up in it and cuddle in its warmth. Teal'c's training was definitely showing. The big Jaffa might not be telepathic, but he was very skilled at meditative and mind techniques and had been quite willing to allow Cam to practice on him.

John explained the situation to the Herb Mother, who shook her head then beckoned to Bambus, who slumped as he trailed behind her, head hanging low.

After a brisk examination, the Herb Mother was reluctant to allow Bambus to leave before finishing treatment. Cam contacted SGC and the decision was made for the entire group to stay.

John took the remainder of his team and the science team to the nearby temple for study. They were allowed free access to the grounds, but the temple was off limits.

After spending several hours shepherding scientists, John was more than ready to strangle the entire group. It made him long for Rodney at his very worst. The evening meal was spent with each group regaling each other with tales of martial prowess. After dinner, John decided to grab the bull by the horns and ask about the temple.

"Elder Graff, we would like to gain access to the temple if possible."

Cam gave John an arch look, which John ignored.

"Any who wish to gain access to the Temple must pass the Test of Daneela." He waved his hands at his fellows. "Of our current population, only I and three others have been granted such privilege."

"As commander of this group, I have to ask what is involved," Cam asked.

"The test is very simple, but must be undertaken by all members of the party. More will be said on this tomorrow." With that, Elder Graff stood and indicated that the group should follow him. They were led a short distance away from the village to a large cave mouth. After traversing a short tunnel, they entered a humongous cavern. Standing evenly spaced around the cave were stacks of mattresses in supporting frames, a platform encircling the stack just below the top-most mattress. A low bench sat alongside each bed next to a sturdy ladder.

"What is this?" Cam asked.

"This? This is the precursor to the test on the morrow. There is nothing here that shall harm you. Sleep well."

Cam waited until Elder Graff was out of earshot before commenting. "What the hell? John, scan the stacks, please."

John pulled out his LSD and paced slow circles around each stack of mattresses. "They're clean. Not even a bed bug."

Cam shucked his pack and set it beside one of the beds. John chose one on the opposite side in the back. If something did happen, it put John, with the highly sought after ATA gene, in the most defensible spot. Even though there weren't many Ancient facilities in the Milky Way, there were enough that the gene was highly prized. Around them, the rest of the troop, minus Bambus, who was with the Herb Mother, chose bunks and bedded down. Two of their Marines tucked into nooks to keep watch. They would wake their replacements in four hours.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Cam topped the platform of John's bed mound and was surprised to find his mate still asleep. Normally, John was up with the sun so this was unusual. A spot of shiny black poking from beneath the blankets had him chuckling. John, wary of friendly natives, had treated this as a possible war zone and slept in his boots.

Reaching out cautiously, Cam touched the nearest green-clad shoulder. He'd learned his lesson about waking John carelessly. The bridge of his nose still had a slight bump in it. "John? It's time to get up. The Pergolans brought breakfast."

John twitched beneath his hand, the spot of black disappeared and one adventurous eyelid rose partway. "'M up."

"No, I'm pretty sure to be up you have to be upright," Cam drawled.

"'Kay, then 'm 'wake," John slurred sleepily.

"Let me see that other gorgeous green eye and we'll discuss your definition of awake."

Instead of the second opening, the first slid closed. Cam sighed and shook John's shoulder harder.

"C'mon, soldier, up and at 'em," Cam said with a bit of bite.

"That hasn't worked since boot," John said with a groan as he cranked open both eyes and rolled onto his side with a wince.

Cam knelt on the platform near John's head, taking in the dark rings under bloodshot eyes. "Baby, are you alright," he asked softly.

"Didn't get much sleep. Friggin' bed has a bushel of rocks in it somewhere."

Cam was genuinely concerned. His stack had rivaled the expensive pillow top mattress he had at home. He'd slept like a baby. He crawled onto the bed and sank into it as he had the one he'd slept on. "Are you coming down with something? The bed's fine."

John shook his head as he sat up slowly and straightened his green jacket. "Tell that to my bruises."

Cam clapped him on the shoulder as he turned back towards the ladder. "Come on down. I'll get you a cup of coffee and hopefully that will make you feel better."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Cam returned with the promised coffee as John's foot hit the floor. John dropped onto the short bench beside his backpack and slumped backwards.

"Seriously, are you alright?"

John snatched the coffee from Cam and downed it in a few quick gulps. "I will be, after a few more of these or if you let me go back to sleep."

"Well, number two is not an option, so you'll have to make do with instant coffee or chava."

"They have chava?" Chava was a staple in Pegasus, so he was surprised to encounter it here in the Milky Way

Cam hooked a thumb over his shoulder. "Yep. The breakfast crew brought in several pitchers of the stuff."

John made to stand, got halfway up then stopped with a groan. He flopped back with a barely concealed yelp.

"John?"

"I'm fine. Just stood up too quickly," John said as he made to rise again.

"Bullshit. You stay where you are until we get a medic to check you over."

"Cam, seriously, I'm alright," John huffed. He shoved off slowly and made it to his feet. Cam fell into step with him as they headed for the cook fire. John felt his stiff, knotted muscles loosening as he walked across the cavern. He accepted a mug of chava from an older woman he remembered from their welcoming committee.

"Thank you, Mother Arissa," he said with a small smile and a short bow.

She inclined her head in acceptance, obviously pleased he'd recalled her name.

Not willing to stiffen up, John paced around the fire as he drank his chava. He stepped closer to the fire for a refill and a bowl of breakfast stew when Lieutenant Wallace shot to his feet and knocked into John. John groaned and hunched over from the impact to his abused body. Cam caught him and eased him to a seat on a log.

"Colonel John, what ails you?"

John looked into Mother Arissa's brown eyes and forced a smile. "I'm f…"

"Young man, do not say it. You are obviously not fine," Mother Arissa said. She called over her shoulder to one of the young men who had accompanied her and spat out an order. He returned moments later, the Herb Mother, Elder Graff, and two other Elders accompanying him. The Herb Mother examined him with a critical eye then, without warning, suddenly split John's tee from neck to waist with a small knife she pulled from somewhere.

Safeties cleared as the Marines took aim at the Herb Mother.

"Stand down! She's trying to help me," John ordered.

Cam shifted to face the troops and waved his hands. "It's alright, boys. The nice lady just moved a little too quickly."

P90's lowered as the group relaxed. Seeing that war was no longer imminent, Cam turned back to John and the Herb Mother in time to see her push the remains of his t-shirt aside, his jacket holding it on at the shoulders. He winced at the sight revealed. John's torso was mottled with bruises; some small while others were the size of his fist. The worst was on John left side. The bruise was the size of his spread hand and shaded the red-purple-black of a deep bruise.

Elder Graff stepped forward and peered at the bruises over the Herb Mother's shoulder. "Colonel John, it is my understanding that you did not have these marks yesterday, correct?"

"That's right, Elder," John said with as much of a bow as he could manage.

"And did anything untoward occur to you during the night?"

John made a face. "Nothing except that I picked the wrong bed. That one must have a bushel of rocks in it."

Elder Graff smiled. "Young warrior, it would have done you no good to sleep upon a different testing device."

"Why not," Cam asked from behind him.

"Because each bed is the same," one of the other Elders said.

"Wait, you referred to the beds as testing devices," John said, voice colored with suspicion.

"Indeed we did," the third Elder, Elder Hywel, stated with a smile. He strode to the nearest and reached between two of the mattresses to withdraw a small rock. "Each bed stack has a single pebble inserted between two near the bottom. This is the Test of Daneela. Revered Daneela was renowned for her beauty, morality, and sensitivity. This test was designed in her honor. Only a person who truly exemplifies those qualities will be able to pass this test."

 _*"Well, it seems like I hooked up with a big ol' sensitive teddy bear."*_ Cam's mind voice was full of laughter. _*"I can't wait to tell Vala. She's told me on numerous occasions that you were all soft and squishy on the inside, like a chocolate covered cherry."*_

 _*"Soft and squishy, huh,*_ John said as he caught the merriment sparkling in Cam's eyes and narrowed his own. _*"Keep it up, laughing boy. I'll tell Teal'c that you've been shirking your practices."*_

 _*"You wouldn't."*_

 _*"Try me."*_

At Elder Graff's request, the rest of their troupe, including Cam, shucked their jackets and tees so that the Elders and Herb Mother could examine them. Cam had a dusting of small, dark bruises scattered across his back, and the Captain in charge of the combat detachment had a few on his left flank. Mind whirring in high gear, John put two and two together. Cam and Captain Howell were ATA positive. He had a feeling that Elder Graff and the others who passed the Test were as well. He sent his deductions to Cam and received a feeling of agreement in return. They also decided to keep the revelation to themselves. The Lucian Alliance, in particular, would be sniffing around in no time if word escaped that some of the Pergolans carried Ancestor blood.

The second elder, Elder Gharry, stood and clapped his hands sharply. "There shall be a Feast of Welcome for our new tribesmen and for the new Initiates to The Fellowship of Daneela."

The three Elders moved off, all but three of the villagers going with them to begin preparations. The Herb Mother rummaged in her bag and straightened with a clay pot in her hands. She undid the cord keeping it closed and removed the lid. John relaxed as the scent of wild berries and vanilla filled the area. She dipped three fingers in and leaned towards John, but John leaned back out of reach.

"It is alright, Colonel John. It is only _melange_ ointment. It will soothe your bruises."

"No offense, Herb Mother, but I'm … I'd prefer Colonel Cameron to apply it to me," John said as he nodded towards Cam, standing behind him with one hand on John's shoulder in support.

The Herb Mother gazed at the two of them, taking in their body language and what wasn't being said. Stooping, she drew out another pot and passed it over with a knowing smile then beckoned one of the other villagers over. "Show Colonel John and Colonel Cameron to the guest huts." She looked back at Cam and John. "The guest huts are right outside this cave. They are comfortable and have their own water supply."

John could tell Cam was hesitant, but he wanted a bed. "Sounds great. Thank you."

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After their escort had left, Cam left to fetch a bucket of water, and upon his return found John perched on the edge of the bed wearing only his pants. Cam set the water down and finished undressing his lover, wincing in sympathy when he saw the full extent of John's bruises. Cam dropped a sponge in the bucket and fished out his liquid soap.

"Do you want to stay seated or stand," he asked as he walked over to stand in front of his mate.

"I'll stand. I don't like sleeping in wet spots," John said with a smirk.

Cam blushed as he helped him up and John grabbed hold of one of the support beams for the little house. Cam bathed his lover quickly, mindful of his bruises and exhaustion. In a situation such as this he'd usually take his time to get reacquainted with John's body and tease, but not today. Clean and dry, John stretched out on the bed carefully. Cam grabbed the clay pot the Herb Mother had given him then straddled John's hips. He scooped some of the ointment out and dabbed it on John's back then proceeded to massage it in slowly. John tucked his arms beneath the pillow and let out several groans accompanied by a few choice curses as Cam ministered to the worst of the bruises. As the ointment took effect, Cam felt John relax beneath him and he was soon snoring softly, hazel eyes hidden behind dark lashes.

Cam finished with John then rubbed some of the ointment into his own bruises. He slid John's .45 beneath the pillow to rest beside his hand where he usually kept it and covered him with a light blanket. Standing, he stretched his back out and checked out the hut. It was rather nice and sturdily built. He discovered a curtain off to one side that could be drawn to block out light and closed it. It would give John privacy and twilight to sleep in. He laid John's clothes, boots, and P90 on a nearby chair then picked up his own gear and set off to see to the rest of their men.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

John woke to a pair of gorgeous blue eyes and the smell of roasting meat. His stomach chose that moment to growl loudly in a reminder that breakfast was a long time ago.

"Are you awake or is there a monster about to eat us?"

"Only monster that gets to have you is me," John growled.

"Same here, baby," Cam said as he set the tray down.

John pushed himself upright cautiously, the pain of the bruises fresh in his memory. When no twinges met his cautious movements, he stretched to full extension. "Oh, that feels good. They ought to use that ointment as a trade item."

Cam smiled as he sat on the edge of the bed by John's thigh. "I mentioned that. Elder Graff said that the only reason they don't trade it is because most of the ingredients grow far from here." John opened his mouth to comment, but Cam beat him to it. "I've already mentioned getting a team to come help them with that and they are quite amenable. For our assistance, we would get a percentage of the yearly yield, of course."

"Of course," John smirked.

"In return, they get a highly marketable trade item, so it's a situation made of win."

John rose and headed for the curtained off chamber pot.

"Might want to offer indoor plumbing too."

He felt Cam's eyes on him as he sauntered across the room and slowly got dressed.

Warm arms wrapped around his middle. "You are such a tease."

"Only for you, honey," John said then twisted in Cam's grip until they faced each other. He raised his arms and cupped Cam's jaw and pulled him in for a kiss.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0

"So let me see if I have this straight," General Hank Landry said. "When you asked about the temple, the Pergolans told you that you had to pass a test."

"Yes, Sir," Cam said.

"And it turned out that the test was to see if you could sense the small rocks that had been placed within the stacks of mattresses that your team slept on."

"Correct."

"Which is actually very fascinating," Daniel interjected. "Over the years we've discovered that many of Earth's myths and legends originated on other planets. In those days, the name of a kingdom they'd never heard of wasn't unusual and was passed off as being very far away, and …"

"Dr. Jackson, you can dissect the report later," Landry said. "Dr. Lam, what is the status on the team?"

"The ointment the Pergolans gave Colonel Mitchell worked well. So far, there are no discernible side effects. Colonel Sheppard's bruises are still dark, but as if they were days old instead of less than thirty-six hours. The bruises on the others are in the same condition. Lieutenant Bambus' rash is clearing up, but he is still considered contagious. The treatment the Herb Mother sent along is working, but I will be keeping him under observation until the rash is completely gone," Carolyn Lam told him.

"Thank you, doctor," Landry said as he swiveled to face him and John. "Colonels, good job. You have the next four days off."

"Thank you, Sir," Cam said as he rose, John following suit. Cam saluted and John snapped one off that managed to come out a little flippant. Cam saw Landry roll his eyes as the two of them turned and left.

Cam was amazed at John's self-control. John actually waited until they got home and were in the apartment before shoving him into a wall and pinning him there.

"Hmmm, four days off, what are we gonna do with ourselves," John asked as he nuzzled Cam's neck.

Cam wrapped his arms around John, careful not to put too much pressure on his still healing and still sore bruises. "Oh, I'm pretty sure we can think of something," he said as he turned his head to nibble on John's ear.

~~ _And life goes on_ ~~


End file.
